Parents, You Are Being Watched!

Robert Fulghum once said:  ”Don’t worry that your children rarely listen to you;  worry that they are always watching you.”  Now, as a parent that is a very sobering thought.  I have been a father and a youth ball coach long enough to notice how kids(especially my kids) can tune me out when I am trying to make an important point.  There is no question, the older my kids get, the less control I have over them.  But I have also noticed, the older my kids get, the more they tune me in at least with their eyes.  They watch everything I do.  So, I better be very careful because everything I do is teaching my children something whether for good or for bad.  My words, my actions and my reactions are teaching something to them every day.  My son, Harrison, noticed me texting while driving.   Texting while driving is not something I normally do.  But, I have to be honest and ask, what message does that send to him?  Ryan noticed me spending time alone with God in prayer.  What message does that send?  Obviously, Ryan got a better message.  The point is, every thing we do teaches.  Consider some other educational opportunities we have as parents:

• Most Christians attend church on average once or twice a month.  What does your church attendance communicate to your kids?
• How do we handle stress and adversity?  Imagine if we modeled, as parents, a prayerful life when it comes to life’s challenges.
• So many young couples getting married today have never developed the life skill of managing money.  If we are not good financial stewards as parents, how will our children ever learn good stewardship themselves?

The point is not to get you discouraged as a parent, but simply to challenge you to always be thinking of the teaching moments you have every day with your children.  Once you think through your parenting through your kid’s perspective, you begin to realize all of the messages you are sending to your kids.

Now, your turn.  Take a moment and share a recent teaching moment you have had with your kids watching.

Spiritual Leadership at Home pt.2

How do you do it?  That is the question I am most asked by men who know they should lead, but just don’t know how to lead.  They accept the call to spiritual leadership gladly, but struggle with it practically.  In a recent message series, I made the case that spiritual leadership involves three primary areas.  Spiritual leadership means being a provider(providing for the material needs of the family), being a protector(protecting the family against evil-physically, emotionally, spiritually), and being a pastor.  It is the role of pastor where the disconnection for most men begins.  The word pastor in Hebrew/Greek means “shepherd.”  Think of it this way.  Your family is your flock and you are the shepherd.  You provide for them, you protect them and you teach them.  As the pastor of your family, your main job is to be the primary Bible teacher in your family.  Your kids should be receiving their primary spiritual instruction from you.  Men will push back and say, “I don’t know the Bible.  How can I teach it?’  My response is, you can learn God’s Word as you teach God’s Word.  You don’t have to be a Bible scholar.  You just have to be a disciple, a learner yourself.

So, how do you get started? Find a family devotional and begin having family devotional times.  For example, currently, I am using, Ruth Graham’s book called, Step in the Bible:  100 Bible Stories for Family Devotions. It gives you a Bible story, discussion questions and a key verse to memorize(optional).  It takes me about 5 minutes of prep time.  We have family devotions every Monday through Friday before school.  Not only is it a great way to begin your day, but it also provides a spiritual context for teaching moments throughout the day.  Try it for a week and I guarantee you will see your flock respond with joy.  That is what being a spiritual leader is all about.

What resources are you using to help you teach God’s Word?

Spiritual Leadership At Home

Real leaders are in short supply.  Constantly, churches, organizations and people search for them.  Throughout the Bible, we even see God searching for them(see Jer. 5:1 and 1 Sam. 13:14).  I believe the greatest need for spiritual leadership is in the home.  It is the one area where I hear the most concern from married couples.  It goes something like this:  wives want their husbands to provide spiritual leadership while most husbands say they do not know how to lead.  This sets up to be a huge source of frustration in many marriages.  Men feel the pressure to lead, but feel inadequate.  Women step up and lead, but feel guilty for it.     So, how do we solve this dilemma?  What does spiritual leadership look like in the home?

During the next few weeks, I want to talk about the facets of spiritual leadership in the home.  As in introduction, let me say this.  The beginning point of spiritual leadership is the Holy Spirit.  Spiritual leadership requires spiritual power which can never be generated by the self.  There is no such thing as a self-made spiritual leader.  A true leader influences others(influences his family) spiritually only because the Spirit works in and through him.  Spiritual leadership starts here.  I like what Oswald Sanders says when he writes, “We can lead others only as far along the road as we ourselves have traveled.  Merely pointing the way is not enough.  If we are not walking, then no one can be following, and we are not leading anyone.”  Men, what is keeping you from walking in the power of the Holy Spirit?